Cinerant: July 2005

Friday, July 29, 2005

No Disparaging Remarks

Last month the company I worked for in DC laid off 1/3 of its employees. It was ugly, unseemly, and I was glad that I got out when I did. In fact, every day as I glean nuggets about what's going on over there I'm glad I'm getting out. More over, as the additional defections start, I'm glad for those people getting out before the place goes under. (And I suspect it's only just a matter of time.)

Last night I found out the lovely addendum to the lay-offs. Apparently in the severance package the company offered was a clause that by accepting the severance package, the signee was legally obligated not to make issues, publish, or make public any grievances the employee had with the company for one calendar year.

Seriously. It's in the severance agreement. Violating that clause can result in a $5,000 fine for each violation AND the offendee will also have to pay the company's court costs.

Well, I never signed such an agreement, so I now feel like I have a cause. To make issue, publish, and make public all the grievances anyone might have with the company. But then I realized, I only have 24 hours in a day. There isn't enough time to really go through the exhaustive laundry list of everything that's wrong with the company.

I mean, I could cite it's lack of strategic vision, lack of belief in its employees, poor management, inability to bring in diversify, and questionable ethics and accounting practices, but seriously--that wouldn't even be the start of it. I've always joked that I should take my experiences and write Office Space: the Musical. Now I feel like it's my mission. First, maybe I'll start with a short story. I don't know. I have to put together a marketing strategy.

Is this an overreaction? ABSOLUTELY NOT! I've always been an believer that stupidity in any form must be stamped out. It's time to put on the platform shoes and get stompin'.

Thursday, July 28, 2005

Parking Woes

Just got my second parking ticket since being here. Lovely. For some reason, I found it highly amusing. Probably won't find it as amusing when I sit down to write the ticket, but whatever.

I also see a large amount of irony in the fact that the place I'm temping for about four weeks will spend about as much in parking as the company I worked for in DC did for my parking in my four years there. I.E., the company I worked for in DC didn't pay for parking, much at all. Less than six months of it, anyway. Of course, now they're in financial trouble. Surprise. When you overpay and have a top-heavy organization...

I also found it highly interesting today when I was reading an article from The New York Times today about Costco's business model. Apparently, their CEO is focused more on his employees and customers than on the bottom line. He is also not interested in making a quick profit, but instead wants to build a company that will be around in 50 or 60 years.

Additionally, Costco had profits last year of $882 million, yet its CEO only had an annual salary of just $350,000. Sure, he has stock that makes him very wealthy, but I think that speaks a lot about a leader's willingness to be "part" of an organization.

I'm not sure what I'm getting at here and what this has to do with parking (other than you get two hours free parking at the Pentagon Centre with a Costco receipt), but I think it's an interesting business model.

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Crash It

Wedding Crashers is the movie with Crash in the title that really should be celebrated this summer. Sure, it's not perfect, there's a horribly unnecessary and unfunny cameo near the end, the final act has some problems, but there's no denying the sheer joy, humor, and exuberance of the thing.

I've always said that Owen Wilson is the funniest person on the planet (and he is), but this really is Vince Vaughn's movie. He steals the show by creating a character that's full of need patheticness, but who really knows the right thing--way deep down. He just has to be reminded of why he would ever want to embrace it. There's a soulful yearning he brings to his eyes that gives him the appearance of a wounded soldier (they lost a lot of good men out there), without making him overly sympathetic.

There's a good supporting cast of wackies. Some of them are introduced and then dropped before they can really take hold in the story (Jane Seymour), but it keeps the movie running forward at a nice clip.

***********SPOILER ALERT******************
The problem comes when Wilson and Vaughn's characters split up and are on the outs. While it might have been a good idea dramatically, it doesn't work in the film. Since the entire movie has just been a joyous overthrow of enthusiasm, this sudden downer really does take the wind out of the sales. A stronger, more experienced director might have been able to help these tones mesh together a little bit. This is only then made tedious by the appearance of Chazz's character. While the idea of having a big-name cameo is a good idea, the director should have found a different actor. Someone not in every single comedy out this summer--and hold for it--someone who's actually funny! And to then not let Wilson's character punch Will Tippin after he's been beaten up by him--it really should've been a dual punch.
************END SPOILER ALERT*************

Having said all this--the film is funny. In fact, I'll probably have to go see it again because the audience I saw it with was laughing so hard that I couldn't understand what was being said a good portion of the time. That's always a good sign. It's a bit raunchy and could have used a little less language, but still, it's gem of a mainstream comedy. Probably one of the best I've seen so far this year.

Monday, July 25, 2005

You're Not Gonna Find This Anywhere Else

I had a whole post done this morning about my weekend, my reaction to Hustle & Flow, my chance to hera from one of the writers of Scrubs, my afternoon playing volleyball, but I had server problems and lost everything. Now you'll just have to imagine what it might have been because I really don't want to retype it.

However, the one part that was just absolutely fascinating that I do want to mention is the fact that when I went by Taco Bell in Burbank last night, I noticed that this parking lot has a space reserved for limos.

Where else are you going to find that besides Hollywood?

I guess it makes sense. This Taco Bell is right across the street from the Warner Brothers Studios, but still. Doesn't there seem to be something inherently wrong with a limo at Taco Bell? If you've got that much money, shouldn't you be wanting food that's not as mass-processed?

Friday, July 22, 2005

Is It Wrong Not to Even Care?

So I went to see Happy Endings last night, which I was really excited about. I came out much less so. I was so disappointed in the movie that I don't know that I even want to talk about it. Is that wrong? I don't know, but really, I could care less. Lisa Kudrow does a nice job, but Jesse Bradford does nothing for me, so I was annoyed with him on the screen.

No offense to Don Roos, but I was less than impressed.

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

When Penguins Attack

I haven't seen March of the Penguins, but I am sure that this got cut. Too bad. It might be enough to make me see the movie.

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Teachable Moment

One of my former co-workers used to talk all the time about "teachable moments." That was simply code for "you've done something wrong" and now it's time to learn to improve.

I'm in desperate need for a series of teachable moments. I've recently realized I don't know how to take a compliment. Actually, I've known this for a while, but I think it's getting worse instead of better.

I've always said that part of my problem is that because of IE, I'm used to getting compliments on paper. Anything else seems like somebody's been blowing smoke up my butt. However, I'm realizing now that anytime anybody gives me any kind of compliment, whether I believe it or not, I don't know how to properly respond. And frankly, I don't know how to solve this problem. For a while I thought that I could respond appropriately to sincere compliments, but either I've not heard a sincere compliment in months (which is possible, but I doubt it), or I've got some major issues.

Ideas?

Saturday, July 16, 2005

Regretting the Move

Yesterday is the first day I really regretted moving to California. Thanks to the California DMV.

I know that all DMVs are bad. I remember hating the one in Alexandria. I always felt sorry for the people who had to wait in line wrapped around the mall in Springfield, waiting to use that one, but nothing I've ever seen matches the incompetence I encountered yesterday.

The first problem was two weeks ago when I went to get my license. That DMV didn't do plate registration, so I had to go to another one. OK.... Whatever. So I was intimidated and finally got around to fixing things and going yesterday. I got there at 9:45.

I waited in line for almost 45 minutes before my number was called. Some lady helps me, tells me since my car is new, I don't need a smog check (a sentiment echoed by the mechanic I took my car to earlier this week when I tried to get my smog check), and she sends me outside to get my vehicle verified.

I go outside, get verified, and then come back. I have to stand in line to wait for another 20 minutes to go to another attendant. She then proceeds to tell me that I have to get a smog check. I told her what the other woman told me and she told me that any car coming into the state needs a smog check. (I wondered if she was looking at the same computer system the first woman looked at.) Ok, so whatever. I agree to go get the smog check. She has everything else done. She tells me that when I get the smog check, come back and it'll just be a manner of giving me the plates.

I go to a little Jiffy Lube-like place up the street to get my smog check, but they can't do it. The computer in my car won't hook up to their computer. I have to go to the dealership to get it done. ARGH! So I drive over to communities to go to the dealership. The dealer then tells me that they don't do smog checks and sends me to another Saturn dealer. (It's 1:00 by this time and I've eaten or drunk nothing all day. And my box of goldfish crackers were in the trunk. I was not a happy man.)

I get to the second Saturn dealership and wait for over an hour to get a smog check done on a 2005 Saturn. You would think they'd know it was okay, but whatever.

I then proceed to go back to the DMV and get back in line and wait for another 25 minutes. (The reason that my second and third waits were shorter was that I got "appointment" numbers. I'd be livid if I made an appointment and had to wait that long.)

I go to the third woman at the DMV. She proceeds to start the entire process over. She starts to challenge me on the smog test. I point her to the paper (even though the test results were electronically submitted to them) and tell her it's good. She then proceeds to look at my paperwork and tell me that since my vehicle was bought in the last 12 years, I have to pay CA sales tax on the entire thing. EXCUSE ME! She looks over at her supervisor (a woman whose mouth was naturally drawn up so tight, you'd think she'd had a lifetime of facelifts) who just nodded. I ask why she's the third person I'd talked to that day and the first to mention this. (She just ignored that question.) So she tells me how much I'm going to have to pay.

She then goes to get some paperwork, comes back, and tells me to write a check for a different (higher) amount. When I ask why, she becomes incredulous and combative. I finally wrote the check because I was going to get nowhere with her. (I needed to have called Jenn G. down on her.)

The whole process was a nightmare. I know that people who work at the DMV have to put up with a lot of crap, but as somebody reminded me last night, those are state jobs, which are not easy to come by, so they had to really want the job. Therefore, they should've been aware and willing to put up with the abuse. Additionally, I was still relatively pleasant all day. I was getting crankier as the day went on and the lack of food was weighing in on my system, but I didn't take it out on them. I really didn't appreciate it being taken back out on me.

I'm so irritated by the whole thing I'm going to call the branch back on Monday and complain. Why am I not calling today? Because the California DMV is so efficient, it's only open on Saturdays once during the entire month. (Explain that one to me.)

Oh, and what time did I leave the DMV? 3:55.

Thursday, July 14, 2005

Emmy Reactions

I don't know if it's my change in location, me getting older, the fact that I didn't watch them live, or the fact that they weren't as appallingly wrong this year, but I'm not incensed about the Emmy nominations this year. Sure, there are things that they got WAY wrong (like completely ignoring Lauren Graham and Gilmore Girls--again), but there's not much that I was surprised by. I'd even argue this season of The West Wing was better than previous, but...

I emphasize the not much. Here are the highlights that surprised me:

No nomination for Shoreh Agdashloo--I mean, she should've won this hands down for her job on 24 and Emmy voters do love their Oscar nominees, but I guess she died and they forgot about her.
Jill Clayburgh--not Vanessa Redgrave got nominated for a guest turn on Nip/Tuck
Out of all the supporting actors on Arrested Development, Jeffrey Tambor is the one nominated. He's good, but there are a lot of actors on the show that had better years.
Scrubs and Zach Braff get nominated, but John C. McGinley doesn't? Explain that one to me.
No Allison Janey! WOAH! I felt my first earthquake--and the richter scale didn't even pick it up.
"Three Stories" from House got nominated for Best Writing, but not Directing. That makes no sense in my book.
Will & Grace got almost all the guest nods? Huh? And how did Sharon Stone not then?
Huff got 7 times the nods of Everwood, Gilmore Girls, Veronica Mars, and Dominic Monaghan combined? Don't get it.

Some things, that people said were surprises (Sandra Oh), weren't. But then, there were some that were--like CCH Pounder's nod. And the lack of Six Feet Under and Sometimes in April love. And though I think Blythe Danner is great, was she really so great to be nominated in three categories? (Supporting Actress in a Drama, Guest Actress in a Comedy, and Lead Actress in a TV Movie).

Emmy rules are different. You have to submit episodes to be judged on for actors and series wins are only judged on specific episodes, so prognosticating at this point is ridiculous--but it ain't gonna stop me.

So, as of today, here is who I think could become the likely winners. (And these opinions will change.)

BEST COMEDY Arrested Development (Housewives has too much heat and not enough funny)
BEST ACTOR IN A COMEDY Jason Bateman Arrested Development
BEST ACTRESS IN A COMEDY Marcia Cross Desperate Housewives (I know Hatcher's got the heat, but she's got the chops and a brilliant final episode to submit)
BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A COMEDY Jeremy Piven Entourage (Hug it out Academy--I know Peter Boyle is the only one from Raymond not to ever win, but sentimentality doesn't really go over with this crew)
BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A COMEDY Jessica Walter Arrested Development
BEST COMEDY WRITING "Finale" Everybody Loves Raymond (Because it was perfect)
BEST COMEDY DIRECTING "Pilot" Desperate Housewives
BEST GUEST ACTOR IN A COMEDY Fred Williard Everybody Loves Raymond
BEST GUEST ACTRESS IN A COMEDY Blythe Danner Will & Grace (cause I'm guessing she's gonna win something)

BEST DRAMA 24
BEST ACTOR IN A DRAMA Ian McShane Deadwood
BEST ACTRESS IN A DRAMA Glenn Close The Shield
BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A DRAMA Terry O'Quinn Lost (It could go Alda cause they love him, but O'Quinn just was one of the most buzzed about characters this season and he took it to the bank. However, if Shatner submits the right episodes, he could walk away with it.)
BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A DRAMA Sandra Oh Grey's Anatomy (Balloon effect off of Sideways)
BEST DRAMA WRITING "Walkabout" Lost (Though frankly, the "Three Stories" episode of House was brilliantly clever.)
BEST DRAMA DIRECTING "Pilot" Lost (This could go Tarantino, but Abrams put together a pilot that is much better than most movies, including either Kill Bill)
BEST GUEST ACTOR IN A DRAMA Ray Liotta ER (This one's the easiest to predict out of everything)
BEST GUEST ACTRESS IN A DRAMA Angela Lanesbury Law & Order SVU (Her recent fall at the Hollywood Bowl will only help. She's never won an Emmy and none of the competition is so strong to demand to be recognized. It could finally happen.)

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

I Can See!?

I've had glasses since I was a Freshman in college. I have a light case of nearsightedness (I think that's the one). The only time I need the glasses is if I'm watching a movie, reading a blackboard, watching TV with subtitles, and sometimes when I'm driving at night. Nevertheless, the Virginia Department of Motor Vehicles claimed that I needed to wear the glasses at all times when I was operating an automobile.

Not California. Apparently, it's okay to be a little blind out here. I got my license the other day and I have no vision restriction.

Make of that what you will. I'm not sure what to think about it honestly.

Monday, July 11, 2005

My Name Twin

So there's this really great extended family at church that has completely taken my friends from Chattanooga and myself under their wing. --Random tangent-blogging in Barnes and Noble and just had a celebrity sighting for a show I've specked-continuing on. I'm not 100% sure how many children are in this family, but I think it's between 7-9. Then there are grandchildren too. When I was over there for the Fourth of July, one of the grandchildren, a four year old boy, realized that we shared the same first name. Thus, he dubbed me his name twin.

Adorable, right? So, every time I show up at a church service, he comes barreling towards me, tries to jump up on me and asks if I'm coming over to his house to play. I haven't effectively convinced him that I'm not really a playmate. That probably has to do with the fact that when I'm over there, all I do is keep stopping up and down so that he and his three old brother can take turns climbing on my back for piggyback rides. (If you doubt it, I have the bruises on my sides where they dig in their knees. I'd be more than glad to show you.) I also don't think he realizes I'm not part of the family since yesterday he asked me to zip up his pants.

So yesterday, I went back to the family's house for lunch after worship. My name twin decided he wanted to ride there with me, so of course, I had to try and make room for him in my back seat. I thought I did a pretty good job of that until we started going and notebooks and papers were falling on top of him. (Remember, I'm living out of my car now, so I have a good excuse for having a lot of stuff back there.)

We had lunch. Thankfully, I think he and the other kids got distracted at sodidn'ting, or didn'tt like it when I toldhadn'tm that I hadn't brought playcouldn'ts, so I couldn't roll in the dirt with them since I had to wear what I had on back to church. When we started to get ready to head back to church, my name twin announced that he wanted to ride with me. The complication arose when his little brother also wanted to ride. Unfortunately, there was no way I could make enough room in my car for both of them. I had too much speaker equipment. (Long story.) So I told them they had to decide for themselves who was getting to ride with me. (I know that three and four year olds don't have the rationality to figure those things out, but I was not about to play bad cop.)

The boys had their mom decide. She decided that since the name twin rode to the house with me, the younger brother could ride back with me. (That's what I would've done too, if I'd been her.) The younger brother is still small enough that we had to put his car seat in the back of my vehicle, and let me tell you, I feel like getting that thing into my backseat was difficult enough that I can now list it as a skill on my resume.

The moment the car seat went in, my name twin started crying. Apparently, he cried the entire thirty minutes on the way to church. So while his mom got an earful of crying, I got an earful of "We there yet?" "We there yet?"on continuous play. Even still, I felt really bad when I accidentally rolled up the back window on his little fingers. (I've never had to use the child locks on my windows before.)

I definitely sense that there are going to be many, many more adventures that result with these two. I know that at some point, I'm going to offer to take the two boys for a Sunday afternoon and give their parents some peace. Even now, I can tell what a mistake that could turn out to be. I think I'll make sure to have reinforcements available at that time.

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

This is the part I hate

I hate the mid-process of packing. I've spent all afternoon packing and you can't tell I've done anything save for a few random boxes leaning against my wall. This of course means I have much more to do, so I have no time to blog about my wildly different Fourth of July or the UCLA Extension class I start Wednesday.

Soon...

Monday, July 04, 2005

Memo to Studio Heads

MEMORANDUM

To: All Studio Heads
From: Common Sense (I know you don't see a lot of me)

Re: Spielberg and Cruise

Under NO circumstances are you to allow these two to work together ever again. Mr. Spielberg can be a brilliant director. There are few movie stars on the planet bigger than Mr. Cruise (his recent PR nightmare aside).

While the two men collaborated together on Minority Report, the results were negligible, slightly painful, but forgettable without too much difficulty.

However, that was before the fiasco that is War of the Worlds. After something so tremendously bad, it is in all our best efforts to prevent something so cataclysmic wrong from occurring again. I know we don't always follow this rule (Michael Bay does continue to find work), but this film is so atrocious that the next person who allows a collaboration between these two should forfeit his/her personal fortune.

There is nothing in the film that works. The characters are ridiculous, obnoxious, and thinly drawn. Even Cruise's star wattage can't save a man-child character like Ray. Unlike most Spielberg films, there is virtually no suspense or excitement. There is simply darkness. The film makes Hook look like Citizen Kane. The ending has to go down as one of the most ludicrous, preposterous, and morally irresponsible endings seen in recent years. There were too many people in the theater in which I saw this laughing at the ending. That is not good for either man's career, the movie, the industry, or the culture. Frankly, I don't think it's good for God either, but then I suspect He's upset over the theologically unsound voice-over that ends the film, so we might escape His wrath on this one, but it is in our best interest to prevent another venture that might remind Him of this atrocity.

I implore you, think of the public we serve, instead of your wallets, the next time these two gentlemen come to you, wanting to work together. For if they create another venture with one another, then it is only fair to think aliens will come down and destroy us for such an unholy creation.

Friday, July 01, 2005

If I were the president

I'm sure the White House has already sprung into action over Justice O'Connor's announcement that she's retiring. Between she and Rehnquist--they're guaranteed then to get to make at least two Supreme Court nominations during the rest of this term. It's possible that they may even get to make more. Who knows.

I don't think anybody doubts that this confirmation process has the potential to be long, arduous, and ugly. And then, the White House may have to turn around and go through it all again. If I were at 1600 Penn., I think I'd be focusing on how to make my life easier for the next little bit.

Sure, the White House is going to feel pressure to appoint another woman to fill O'Connor's position, but I think that would be a mistake. If they decide to, it's fine, but they shouldn't feel like they have to. The Supreme Court is not about quotas in any way, shape or form. And Ginsburg will still represent the estrogen on the court.

For Justice O'Connor's position, I would nominate--Sen. Orrin Hatch.

Here's why:

He's a smart man. He's intelligent, his background would serve him well and he'd be able to do the job. At least as thoroughly as some of the other justices. And as former head of the Judicial Committee, he knows what's going on.
He's conservative. Hatch would really please the social conservatives that support Bush because he is one of the more socially conservative Senators.
It wouldn't screw up the Senate. UT Governor Huntsman can appoint another Republican until a special election when a Republican will be officially put into the seat by the voters. No shift in the Senate's power.
He would be an easy confirmation. This is a huge one. I've always suspected that Hatch supported Specter for the judicial Chairmanship for this reason. Hatch has been floated as a potential for a while, so he might suspect this is coming. Moreover, Hatch is well-respected in the Senate. Nobody's going to really go after him. His politics are known. I find it impossible to believe that enough Democrats would try and filibuster his appointment. He could be confirmed VERY quickly.

I'm sure there are lots of names bandied about and there are things to consider I'm not aware of at all, but if I could whisper something in the President's ear, that's what I'd suggest.

Cinerant